Betty N. Bennett Obituary (1942

Betty Noreen (Helland) Bennett, treasured mother, grandmother, fiance, sister, aunt and friend, passed away at her Poulsbo, Washinton home on Nov. 4, 2020, with her loving family holding her hands as she went home to Heaven. Betty was born to Bertha "Bertie" (Jull) and Marion Hoenshell in June 1942 at the little hospital in Port Gamble, Wash. Her sister, MaryAnn, was only 13 months older and sister, Joyce, 11 months younger. So the three sisters were quite close and usually dressed alike in clothes made by their mother. After Bertie married Orville Helland in July 1951, Orville adopted Betty, MaryAnn and Joyce, and two more sisters were born, Christlyn and Becky. The five Helland sisters were surrounded by love from both the extended Jull and Helland families, and "Mama and Daddy" always had room at the table for guests. It was a home filled with love, laughter and dancing. Tragically, Orville died unexpectedly of a heart attack in 1958. On Bertie's side of the family, a genetic disease called polycystic kidney disease (PKD) took the lives of many family members before the invention of dialysis and success of transplants. Loss became an ongoing part of Betty's life, yet she lived with joy for the present and hope of seeing her loved ones again. After graduating from North Kitsap High School in 1960, Betty earned her Registered Nurse certification at Tacoma General School of Nursing in August 1963. A week later, she married her high school sweetheart, Alex. Bennett, and they moved to Everett, Wash., where Alex. taught and Betty worked as a labor and delivery nurse at Everett General Hospital until daughter Sharyl was born in 1966. Son Ross followed in 1973. Betty loved her children with every ounce of her being and was a constant source of support to them her entire life. In 1968, Betty, Alex. and Sharyl were on the brink of leaving for Morocco, where Alex. was to take a Fulbright teaching position, when tragedy struck the Helland family again. "Mama" (and, by now, "Tutu" to two grandchildren) Bertie suffered an aneurism and died a few days later, leaving the two youngest Helland sisters, just 14 and 16, without parents. Betty and Alex., without hesitation, sacrificed their dreams and moved back to the family home in Poulsbo to raise Christlyn and Becky. Betty continued to live on the family homestead until she passed away in the place she called home for almost her entire 78 years. After working as an RN for Everett General Hospital, Ebenezer Home and Martha and Mary Nursing Home, Betty became an aide in Peg Treanor's special education classroom at Poulsbo Elementary. She was "Miss Betty" to her students and told many stories of the joy she shared with them. On one memorable day, she brought a hard-boiled egg with her lunch. She pretended to gently break the egg on each of their heads (a Bennett-family, egg-cracking tradition), and then with great gusto, smashed it on her own forehead. A huge commotion broke out among her students as raw egg dripped from her face and hair, because alas, the egg she'd hastily packed wasn't hard boiled after all! The PKD that ran in the Jull family also plagued Betty, who suffered with high blood pressure and painful cysts much of her adult life. In addition, after years of abdominal pain, she was diagnosed with rare abdominal epilepsy. In 1993, she could no longer work, and retired on disability. Even then, she labored tirelessly as the Washington state representative for the Polycystic Kidney Foundation in support of its mission: to find treatments and a cure for PKD. She was passionate about helping save her family from more pain and loss from PKD. After her marriage to Alex. ended, Betty found a wonderful group of friends through the Bremerton Professional Singles Club. She loved going to dances with them, and one night in December 1989, a member brought along his friend Jerry McCrary, who was visiting from Kodiak, Alaska. Jerry asked Betty to dance, and thus began a love story that lasted the rest of her life. At the dance, one of Betty's former dance partners remarked that he couldn't compete with "Sergeant Preston of the North." That was a sweet memory between them and Jerry's letters and cards to Betty were always signed from "S.P." For more than 30 years, "S.P." was by Betty's side. His devotion to her was especially evident as he cared for her as her health declined in the last several years. Six grandchildren knew Betty as Grandma B, a name she chose and kept - even though one grandson pronounced it "garbage" for a time. Grandma B loved being a grandmother and did nearly anything for her grandkids, including "bouncing like Tigger" and spraining her ankle, spending two months caring for her oldest grandson while Sharyl was on bedrest with her second pregnancy, sitting through countless recitals, ballgames and school plays, and always offering a loving ear for the trials her grandchildren experienced. Ever the RN, she could diagnose almost any ailment or injury over the phone, and had medical and emotional advice ready for anyone who asked. Betty loved people. She never met a stranger, nor even a wrong-number caller, who she didn't treat like a friend. One year, running late to Thanksgiving dinner at her dear Aunt Vicky's house, Betty called and talked to one of Aunt Vicky's sons to tell them "Aunt Betty" was running behind. After a nice conversation with the young man, she headed out to Thanksgiving, eventually arriving and apologizing for her tardiness, with a nod to the cousin she'd spoken to on the phone. No one at Thanksgiving knew anything about the phone call. When Betty realized she'd dialed the wrong number, she insisted on calling the number again to tell them she was indeed not coming to their Thanksgiving! Once, at an end-of-school staff party, Betty was having a lovely time when she realized she knew absolutely no one there. She discovered she'd crashed the party, and the party she was invited to was next door! Her inadvertent host didn't want Betty to leave, because they were having such fun together. Amidst Betty's joy for life was grief at the loss of loved ones. She was preceded in death by her father Orville Helland, her mother Bertie Helland, many dear aunts and uncles, three of her precious sisters, MaryAnn Goe, Joyce Padgett and Becky (Ann) Finch, and her treasured best friend Martha (Watland) Gentili. Each loss broke her heart, yet she continued to press on with love for those who remained. Betty is survived by her daughter, Sharyl (Brian) Rapavy, her son Ross (Michelle) Bennett, fiance Jerry McCrary, Jerry's children Jennifer (Bob) Gunderson and Brian McCrary, former husband Alex. Bennett, sister Christlyn Hill, and grandchildren Taylor, Nathan, Marisa and Kalina Rapavy, and Corey and Carson Bennett, along with many cherished aunts, cousins, nieces and nephews and countless dear friends. Betty was proud of the long history of the Jull family in Poulsbo, and will be buried at the Mountain View Cemetery there, next to her sister, MaryAnn Goe. Her sister Joyce's ashes will be buried above her, fulfilling Betty's wish that Joyce be buried near MaryAnn. Due to COVID restrictions, there will be no services at this time. Betty's family plans a Celebration of Life in June, to honor the traditional "June Birthday Party" which celebrated all five sisters' birthdays. Arrangements entrusted to The Stone Chapel Poulsbo Mortuary. To donate in Betty's memory, please consider supporting the research of the PKD Foundation at https://pkdcure.org/ To be notified of Betty's Celebration of Life, send an e-mail to grandmab6grands@gmail.com. In the meantime, you can honor her by wearing pink, having a friendly chat with a stranger, listening to "I Hope You Dance" by Lee Ann Womack and living the lyrics of that song, which Betty loved. Mom, you were our unfailing supporter, cheerleader and best friend every single day. No one could ever doubt your love for us - and we never did. Thank you for fighting through your pain to stay with us. We're thankful you're at peace with Jesus and the loved ones you've missed for so long. To quote the song you often sang to us: So I'll cherish the old rugged cross Till my trophies at last I lay down I will cling to the old rugged cross And exchange it some day for a crown